Limerence & The LO of “High Value”

Limerence & The LO of “High Value”

Limerence is often triggered most when you begin to see your LO (limerence object or love object) as someone of extraordinarily high value — and you start to devalue yourself. A power dynamic begins to form as you put this magical other person on a pedestal, while you slowly begin to feel less and less empowered. The LO now has a power over you that you can’t seem to control. This often happens during the “crystallization” process - a time when you highlight all of LO’s amazing qualities and realize this is more than a “crush.” Your feelings are stronger and more uncontrollable than you may be prepared for.

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Limerence and Addiction to Excitement

Limerence and Addiction to Excitement

If you’ve been struggling to overcome your limerence experience and battling the nonstop thoughts and feelings about your LO, the addiction to emotional excitement factor is something to consider as a part of the why in your limerence journey.

For some of us, especially those of us who have a history of depression or anxiety, the emotional excitement we experience with limerence can be extremely stimulating - even when it becomes more painful. Instead of feeling flat or if we are bored and unmotivated, the dopamine surge that happens when we see or contact LO can be euphoric. We can find that if we examine what is happening, we may be more prone to reaching out or follow an impulse to contact LO when we feel bored or understimulated emotionally. Our brains have been rewired to crave the anticipation and excitement and now look for that hit to feel better or at least “OK.”

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Does Mutual Limerence Really Exist?

Does Mutual Limerence Really Exist?

Mutual limerence is the intense, fated seeming love coupling portrayed in story books or movies…after conquering a big obstacle, both people fall madly, head over heels in love in mutual emotional and physical bliss, admiration and passion for each other. For many of us, it’s the ideal and why we keep searching for “the one.” And while mutual limerence certainly does occur (at least in the beginning of a relationship) the timing of limerence happening mutually in a sustained way, for both people and at the same degree of intensity is much, much more rare.

Read on to find out more about mutual limerence….

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Food For Love: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation

Food For Love: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation

All love stories start out with the big three: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation.

In reciprocated, mutualing-falling-in-love love stories, the Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation trifecta create the exciting beginning stage or “honeymoon” phase. But what if there are obstacles? What if the one you love isn’t available, or worse, you’re not sure if they feel the same way? Falling in love is a natural progression and a natural state of being, but….

Love doesn’t really seem to care if you’re already married or committed…Or if the one you love is. Or if they give you mixed signals….

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